Bellevue Christian Counseling Logo

  • ServicesRead about the expertise available
    • Individual ServicesAddress your personal concerns confidentially
      • ADHD
      • Abandonment Issues and Neglect
      • Aging and Geriatric Issues
      • Anger Management
      • Anxiety
      • Autism Spectrum Disorder
      • Bipolar Disorder
      • Chemical Dependency
      • Counseling for Children
      • Counseling for Teens
      • Codependency
      • Depression
      • Eating Disorders
      • EMDR
      • Grief and loss Counseling
      • Individual Counseling
      • Infidelity and Affairs
      • Lifespan Integration Therapy
      • Men’s Issues
      • OCD
      • Personal Development
      • Psychological Testing
      • PTSD
      • Relationship Issues
      • Sex And Porn Addiction
      • Sexual Abuse
      • Spiritual Development
      • Trauma
      • Weight Loss
      • Women’s Issues
    • Christian Couples CounselingWork through challenges together
      • Couples Counseling
      • Premarital Counseling
      • Marriage Counseling
    • Family CounselingEstablish the peaceful home you desire
      • Christian Counseling for Children
        and Teens
      • Family Counseling
    • Group CounselingBenefit from the support of others
      • Men’s Sexual Addiction Recovery
        Group
      • All Counseling Groups
    • Online Counseling
    • Anxiety
    • Depression
    • Marriage Counseling
    • Sex And Porn Addiction
  • LocationsChoose from our variety of office locations
    • Anacortes 1Anacortes
    • Bellevue
    • Bothell 8Bothell
    • Bellevue Christian Counseling 1Edmonds
    • Everett 8Everett
    • Federal Way
    • Kent 2Kent
    • Kirkland Christian CounselingKirkland
    • Lacey Christian CounselingLacey
    •  1Mill Creek
    •  1Monroe
    • Oak Harbor Office OutsideOak Harbor
    • Poulsbo
    •  1Puyallup
    • Redmond 3Redmond
    • Seattle Ballard 6Seattle Ballard
    •  1Seattle Downtown
    • Seattle Greenlake 10Seattle Greenlake
    • Silverdale Office FrontSilverdale
    • Tacoma 6Tacoma
    •  1Spokane
    • Spokane ValleySpokane Valley
    • Vancouver
    •  1Online Counseling
  • CounselorsFind the best counselor for your needs
  • CareersBecome an affiliated Christian counselor
  • (425) 939-6856Please give us a call, we are here to help
header-image

How Far Do You Go?

Bellevue Christian Counseling
https://bellevuechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/bellevue.jpg
https://bellevuechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/cropped-cropped-seattle-logo.png
330 112th Ave NE, Suite 302
BELLEVUE, WA 98004
United States
330 112th Ave NE, Suite 302
BELLEVUE, WA 98004
United States
Photo of Barney Armstrong

Barney Armstrong

Mar
2012
18

How Far Do You Go?

Barney Armstrong

Christian Counseling for Children and TeensCounseling for Teens

That’s a pretty simple yet unpopular question for Christians, whether you are planning to date, in the midst of dating or engaged.  How do you avoid things you will regret? How do you live inside of a romantic relationship, yet avoid sex?  How far can you go?  Over the years, I have found it helpful to draw a definitive, clear line between affection and foreplay.

Differentiating Affection and Foreplay

Foreplay in a dating relationship that values purity is like teasing a dog with a steak.  When you are alone with your date ask yourself, are your actions kind toward the other?  We are reminded that the Apostle Paul calls sexual promiscuity fraud (I Thess. 4:6)!  Affection is something you offer the other. It is an expression of regard, admiration and loyalty to your friend, not simply an avenue of self-gratification.

So, when you are alone together, what boundaries will you set? If you draw the line between affection and foreplay, between giving and enticement, you will be able to tell where your desires are coming from. In the smallest of actions you can see the difference between pure desire and lust.

Like us if you are enjoying this content.

For instance, if you are honest with yourself and your feelings, you will admit that passionate kissing and extensive use of your hands can excite you sexually and carry your thoughts away – that’s foreplay.  The Song of Solomon continually admonishes you to not stir up or “arouse love” before it’s time.  Don’t go there in the first place and you will have no regrets.

Where you draw the physical line becomes difficult to see because the world sends a very different message.  The message we hear every day is not about purity; not about genuine affection for each other; not genuinely loving another person.

Whether you are a teen being pressured by your peers or a mature couple influenced by music, the Internet, TV and movies, the world is not on your side.  Who is?  A Christian counselor can clarify the message of those who are on your side – God, the Bible, your church and family. A Seattle Christian Counselor can show you what it means to love and respect one another while dating or being engaged and lead you into genuine purpose and specific goals for your dating life.

  • Share on Facebook
  • Tweet it
  • ↑ Back to top
Photo of Barney Armstrong
Schedule with Barney
  • Appointment Info

  • Your Info

  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

Barney Armstrong

Licensed Counselor
(206) 701-9144 barneya@bellevuechristiancounseling.com

Life should be more than just pain and trials. Though they can serve a purpose, I believe that God has much more in store for you. My hope is to help you discover the wonderful joys and strength that lie beneath the pain and trauma you might be facing. Through Christ, we can conquer fear and find freedom, healing, and purpose. Whatever challenges you face, I offer you a safe place for you to discover all that God can do for your life. Read more articles by Barney »

Other articles that might interest you...

spacer

spacer

spacer

About Barney

Photo of Barney Armstrong

Barney Armstrong, MA, LMHC

Licensed Counselor

Life should be more than just pain and trials. Though they can serve a purpose, I believe that God has much more in store for you. My hope is to help you discover the wonderful joys and strength that lie beneath the pain and trauma you might be facing. Through Christ, we can conquer fear and find freedom, healing, and purpose. Whatever challenges you face, I offer you a safe place for you to discover all that God can do for your life. View Barney's Profile

Recent articles by Barney

  • Aug 13 · How to Cure Depression: Is it Really Possible?
  • Mar 23 · Codependency Recovery: Two Expert Tips
  • Jun 26 · How to Forgive and Really Mean It: Part II
See all articles by Barney »

Related Services

  • Christian Counseling for Children and Teens
  • Counseling for Teens

Barney's Office Locations

  • Photo of the Bellevue office

    Bellevue

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (425) 939-6856
    330 112th Ave NE,, Suite 302 Bellevue, WA 98004

    View Office Details
  • Photo of the Redmond office

    Redmond

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (425) 250-6282
    8195 166th Ave NE,, Suite #204 Redmond, WA 98052

    View Office Details
  • Photo of the Online (WA only) office

    Online (WA only)

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (206) 388-3929
    444 Northeast Ravenna Boulevard Seattle, WA 98115

    View Office Details

Subscribe to our Newsletter

Bellevue Christian Counseling Logo
Bellevue Christian Counseling
Professional help with faith-based values
We are an association of professional, independently licensed Christian counselors experienced in helping people of all ages find healing for a wide variety of issues.
© 2023 Bellevue Christian Counseling. All rights reserved.
330 112th Ave NE,, Bellevue, WA 98004. Tel (425) 939-6856.
Facebook Twitter Online Counseling About Us Privacy Policy Terms of Use Feel free to contact us!
COVID-19 Service Update: We are still open for business. In office and online counseling is available if needed.