Anger Management

I Am Angry Because…

Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry… – James 1:19

There are healthy expressions of anger and unhealthy ones. Why do some people express anger in an unhealthy way? Have you ever asked yourself this question? One of the steps toward getting a handle on unhealthy anger is asking what causes it.

To Hide Pain or Emotions

Many people have emotions or pain that they feel embarrassed about or have difficulty managing, such as loneliness, fear, or lack of control. Anger is often a shield to hide behind so that we do not feel the vulnerability of others seeing what pain and emotions we are hiding.

Anger can be a common place to turn for people who find it hard to express their emotions in healthy ways. This difficulty of talking out feelings can stem from a childhood in which a person never felt allowed to freely express pain, sadness, or anger.

A Behavior Learned in our Formative Years

Many people grew up with caretakers who had unhealthy expressions of anger, such as screaming or isolating oneself. These behaviors, when exposed to us at young ages, can become learned. When we carry these behaviors into our adult relationships, we can feel ashamed that we have unhealthy anger patterns, and let anger over this fact plunge us into an unhealthy cycle.

A Mental Health Problem

Conditions like addiction, bipolar disorder, anxiety, and depression can be undercurrents of anger problems. Mental health disorders can make the healthy expression of anger very difficult.

Anger management issues can leave you and your family feeling worn out. Bellevue Christian Counseling offers helpful, biblical, and professional support to those who have anger issues. By helping clients heal the wounds in their hearts that fuel anger, Christian anger management counseling can help you gain freedom from and control over your anger.

Anger is not in itself sinful. There is righteous anger at injustice that we can feel when we see another’s rights violated or when we respond to evil in the world. These are healthy expressions of anger. Healthy anger can be a constructive force for change in the world, inspiring those around you to take action against what is wrong.

Jesus entered the Temple and began to drive out all the people buying and selling animals for sacrifice. He knocked over the tables of the money changers and the chairs of those selling doves. – Matthew 21:22

When the house of God was being used by merchants as a marketplace, Christ demonstrated righteous anger. Even His disciples understood His anger as “zeal for God’s house.” But when we let anger go unchecked, it no longer serves a positive purpose for us and those around us, but can take on a life of its own, causing more problems for us and others.

Here are some ways you can tell when anger has gotten out of control:

• When it leads to aggressive behavior such as shouting or verbal abuse
• When it leads to violence or self-harm
• When it causes legal problems or social problems
• When it causes others not to want to be around the person because of their anger
• When it becomes a tool for controlling others

How do you know if you or someone you know has anger management issues?

• You have constant feelings of frustration toward yourself and other people
• It is hard for you to enjoy life or the company of other people
• You are quickly angered and often resort to yelling or arguing
• You may experience physical symptoms, such as high blood pressure, rapid breathing, or nausea

People with anger issues can often feel defeated or ashamed because they’ve lived with these issues all their lives, but have no way of controlling them. The tendency for someone suffering from anger issues and those around them is to try to normalize the behavior or pretend it’s just their personality. But the best answer to anger problems is not shame or minimization, but Christian anger management counseling. A professional Christian counselor can help you learn to manage your emotions and deal with the hurt that fuels it.

But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language … – Colossians 3:8

How Bellevue Christian Counseling Can Help

As Christians we go to Christ not just to get saved, but to continue to be transformed and conformed to His image through His word, His people, prayer, and the work of the Holy Spirit.

The counselors at Bellevue Christian Counseling are professionally engaged with the best practice approaches for dealing with anger management. Bellevue Christian Counseling goes beyond typical counseling processes to further your spiritual healing. People of different age, ethnic, and experience backgrounds have broken free from the bonds of unhealthy anger and found freedom in forgiveness, redemption, and healing.

All Ages Benefit from Anger Management Counseling

Adults can benefit from Christian anger management counseling by getting a better grasp on what triggers their anger, learning to see warning signs before the anger gets out of control, becoming comfortable expressing emotions in a healthy way, building accountability structures into their lives, and growing in a relationship with Christ that spurs healing in their relationships with others.

Our professional child and adolescent counselors can help young people who struggle with anger issues discover what might underlie unhealthy anger. In a safe, compassionate setting, our counselors can teach children or teens healthy ways of expressing strong emotions, and work with their parents to extend the safe environment into the home. Most importantly, professional Christian counselors help children struggling with anger to find forgiveness and healing through faith in Jesus Christ.

Stop being angry! Turn from your rage! Do not lose your temper – it only leads to harm. – Psalm 37:8

Your anger could be causing harm to yourself or other people in your life if you notice a tendency to be unable to calm down or an uncontrollable urge to burst into fits of rage. Although it is popular to speak of “venting,” it has been shown that venting only leads to more aggressive behavior. Worse, your health and the well-being of those around you could be adversely affected by unchecked anger.

Your Health is at Stake Due to Unchecked Anger

Intense, unhealthy anger causes physical manifestations of intense emotion. Our respiratory, digestive, and cardiovascular systems can be negatively affected as a result of patterns of unhealthy anger. The release of stress hormones during bouts of anger such as cortisol lead to adverse health reactions, including increased blood pressure, low metabolism, or blood sugar imbalance. Moreover, the social effects of anger issues often involve isolation, loneliness, shame, and depression. Bellevue Christian Counseling can help you deal with your anger by understanding its cause, learning to handle your emotions, and working toward healing through Christ.

Your Family is at Stake Due to Unchecked Anger

Countless family relationships have been damaged because of unhealthy anger issues. Loved ones who live around a person struggling with anger feel unloved and underappreciated. Domestic violence often erupts as target family members come into the inevitable conflict resulting from a constant presence of anger.

Children acquire behavior problems and anxiety because of the life-shaping effects of being around angry outbursts and ongoing unhealthy anger. Communication and problem solving within families suffer as a result of unchecked anger.

Christian family counseling may be an appropriate step to take if you suspect that anger is harming your family. At Bellevue Christian Counseling, our professional counselors have helped countless families heal from the pain caused by anger and move forward with forgiveness.

A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. – Proverbs 15:1

If you’re ready to overcome the harmful, lasting effects of uncontrolled anger, visit our online counselor directory or call us at 425-939-6856 to schedule an appointment. We want to see you living a peaceful, fulfilling life, and we believe it’s possible. Give us a call today.