Bellevue Christian Counseling Logo

  • ServicesRead about the expertise available
    • Individual ServicesAddress your personal concerns confidentially
      • ADHD
      • Abandonment Issues and Neglect
      • Aging and Geriatric Issues
      • Anger Management
      • Anxiety
      • Autism Spectrum Disorder
      • Bipolar Disorder
      • Chemical Dependency
      • Counseling for Children
      • Counseling for Teens
      • Codependency
      • Depression
      • Eating Disorders
      • EMDR
      • Grief and loss Counseling
      • Individual Counseling
      • Infidelity and Affairs
      • Lifespan Integration Therapy
      • Men’s Issues
      • OCD
      • Personal Development
      • Psychological Testing
      • PTSD
      • Relationship Issues
      • Sex And Porn Addiction
      • Sexual Abuse
      • Spiritual Development
      • Trauma
      • Weight Loss
      • Women’s Issues
    • Christian Couples CounselingWork through challenges together
      • Couples Counseling
      • Premarital Counseling
      • Marriage Counseling
    • Family CounselingEstablish the peaceful home you desire
      • Christian Counseling for Children
        and Teens
      • Family Counseling
    • Group CounselingBenefit from the support of others
      • Men’s Sexual Addiction Recovery
        Group
      • All Counseling Groups
    • Online Counseling
    • Anxiety
    • Depression
    • Marriage Counseling
    • Sex And Porn Addiction
  • LocationsChoose from our variety of office locations
    • Anacortes 1Anacortes
    • Bellevue
    • Bothell 8Bothell
    • Bellevue Christian Counseling 1Edmonds
    • Everett 8Everett
    • Federal Way
    • Kent 2Kent
    • Kirkland Christian CounselingKirkland
    • Lacey Christian CounselingLacey
    •  1Mill Creek
    •  1Monroe
    • Oak Harbor Office OutsideOak Harbor
    • Poulsbo
    •  1Puyallup
    • Redmond 3Redmond
    • Seattle Ballard 6Seattle Ballard
    •  1Seattle Downtown
    • Seattle Greenlake 10Seattle Greenlake
    • Silverdale Office FrontSilverdale
    • Tacoma 6Tacoma
    •  1Spokane
    • Spokane ValleySpokane Valley
    • Vancouver
    •  1Online Counseling
  • CounselorsFind the best counselor for your needs
  • CareersBecome an affiliated Christian counselor
  • (425) 939-6856Please give us a call, we are here to help
header-image

The Power of Forgiveness

Bellevue Christian Counseling
https://bellevuechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/the-power-of-forgiveness-4.jpg 300 225
https://bellevuechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/bellevue.jpg
https://bellevuechristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/cropped-cropped-seattle-logo.png
330 112th Ave NE, Suite 302
BELLEVUE, WA 98004
United States
330 112th Ave NE, Suite 302
BELLEVUE, WA 98004
United States
Photo of Andrew Engstrom

Andrew Engstrom

Sep
2015
30

The Power of Forgiveness

Andrew Engstrom

Individual CounselingRelationship Issues

Forgiveness is generally regarded as a virtue, and most people consider it a command. But we rarely consider forgiveness as an act of personal health. In this article, I introduce a new series on forgiveness, and show how science has found forgiveness to be important to our health and well-being.

Wounds are Deep Hurts that Need to be Healed

The fact is that we do wrong to others. All human beings occasionally – or often – act out of selfishness or fear, and inevitably hurt someone else. We have therefore also all been wronged by someone – either occasionally, or often. The hurt that results always varies and is unique; it is difficult to define, and requires healing. Sometimes these hurts result in wounds – hurts that are deep and that continue to affect our lives. Wounds are hurts that become a part of our lives – and unfortunately they also become a part of who we are. Wounds require an intentional effort in order to heal, and counseling is one way for them to be healed.

Forgiveness is Not Unique to Christianity

The concept of forgiveness is not unique to Christianity. In fact, it is ubiquitous to the human condition. As relational beings, people have always come to realize at some point in their lives that wrong-doing cannot be stopped – and that we cannot stop in ourselves. The only alternative to forgiveness is war or denial. When wise people have realized that they must forgive, and when they have forgiven, they have discovered that it is a path to healing.

Like us if you are enjoying this content.

Scientific Research into Forgiveness

Positive Psychology has been quick to adopt forgiveness as one of its main tenets, and as one of the ways it measures wellness. This is because forgiveness is so powerfully associated with wellness and human thriving. People who practice forgiveness have been found to enjoy considerable health and wellness benefits. The field of Positive Psychology has consistently found that a moment of forgiveness can be a potent agent of healing for patients. Yet scientific research cannot define what it means for a person to hold resentment (unforgiveness) in their heart. Conversely, research cannot fully explain why releasing someone in forgiveness also releases the forgiver – it is an intangible matter of the soul. Nevertheless, science has spent a great deal of time and effort studying the idea of forgiveness and its effects. And the results are nothing short of exciting.

Scientific studies have linked to forgiveness to overall life satisfaction, hope, and self-esteem. Those who forgive have been found to suffer less depression and anxiety, less mental illness, and they experience fewer negative effects (such as the outward showing of emotion). However, the aspect of forgiveness that has really caused a stir in the field of psychology is its positive impact on interpersonal relationships. This is something that is greatly emphasized as psychology professionals continually seek to improve human well-being. Forgiveness has also been associated with marital longevity, together with a positive effect on relationship satisfaction and relationship commitment. Most importantly, studies have been able to establish that forgiveness is a critical factor in repairing relationships following a transgression. This may sound like something obvious, or possibly something that you have been taught, especially in a Christian context. But it is worth noting that scientific research is empirically confirming such an important concept. Forgiveness really does heal and give life to relationships.

What Does it Mean to Forgive?

But what exactly does it mean to forgive? And what do you do if the person who has transgressed against you does not apologize, or even denies that they did anything wrong? What is transgression? How do you know if you have fully forgiven someone? Does forgiveness imply that you condone the transgressor’s actions – is it just a limp capitulation? And how should you act toward someone you have forgiven?

In this short series on forgiveness, I will dedicate several articles to explaining what forgiveness is, what it is not, and what the Bible says to about forgiveness. I will also provide ideas and exercises that can help you to practice forgiveness in order to tap into this powerful phenomenon in your own life.

Christian Counseling to Tap into the Power of Forgiveness

If you would like to engage in counseling from a strengths-based perspective, please contact me to inquire about setting up an initial session to explore how Christian counseling might fit into your journey and assist you in the matter of forgiveness. As a Christian counselor, it is my pleasure to join with clients and help them to see the ways they have already overcome in life, and how God has uniquely shaped them both to do great things and to experience joy and goodness in their lives and relationships.

 

Photos
“Hug,” courtesy of Petras Gagilas, Flickr CreativeCommons (CC BY-SA 2.0); “Couple,” courtesy of T.J. Lentz, Flickr CreativeCommons (CC BY-SA 2.0)

  • Share on Facebook
  • Tweet it
  • ↑ Back to top
Photo of Andrew Engstrom
Andrew is currently not accepting new clients

Andrew Engstrom

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
(425) 354-5472 andrewe@seattlechristiancounseling.com

Helping couples heal their relationships by first better understanding themselves is what I do as a Christian counselor. I offer you support and insight for overcoming obstacles that stand in the way of forming lasting, fulfilling relationships with others and God. Whether you’re looking for marriage or premarital counseling, together we will strive to learn more about yourself, how you affect others, and how they affect you. With this knowledge, you can learn how to make healthy choices that will help you grow in all the relationships in your life. Read more articles by Andrew »

Other articles that might interest you...

An Introduction to Positive Psychology
Photo of Andrew Engstrom

Andrew Engstrom

An Introduction to Positive Psychology

Part 1 of a Series on Positive Psychology An intent conversation on the meaning of life will often include the...

continue reading »
spacer

Positive Psychology: Human Strengths
Photo of Andrew Engstrom

Andrew Engstrom

Positive Psychology: Human Strengths

Part 2 of a Series on Positive Psychology   In my previous article, I introduced the still-new field of Positive Psychology,...

continue reading »

About Andrew

Photo of Andrew Engstrom

Andrew Engstrom, MS, LMFT

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Helping couples heal their relationships by first better understanding themselves is what I do as a Christian counselor. I offer you support and insight for overcoming obstacles that stand in the way of forming lasting, fulfilling relationships with others and God. Whether you’re looking for marriage or premarital counseling, together we will strive to learn more about yourself, how you affect others, and how they affect you. With this knowledge, you can learn how to make healthy choices that will help you grow in all the relationships in your life. View Andrew's Profile

Recent articles by Andrew

  • Apr 17 · How to Build Behavior and Emotional Awareness in Relationships
  • Apr 11 · Common Problems in Relationships: Lack of Body Awareness
  • Feb 24 · Creating Safety in Relationships: Crucial Conversations in Couples Therapy
See all articles by Andrew »

Related Services

  • Individual Counseling
  • Relationship Issues

Andrew's Office Locations

  • Photo of the Seattle Downtown office

    Seattle Downtown

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (206) 388-3929
    602 Valley St Seattle, WA 98109

    View Office Details
  • Photo of the Bothell office

    Bothell

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (425) 939-7959
    10116 Main St,, Suite 204 Bothell, WA 98011

    View Office Details
  • Photo of the Online (WA only) office

    Online (WA only)

    Washington

    General Office Number

    (206) 388-3929
    444 Northeast Ravenna Boulevard Seattle, WA 98115

    View Office Details

Subscribe to our Newsletter

Bellevue Christian Counseling Logo
Bellevue Christian Counseling
Professional help with faith-based values
We are an association of professional, independently licensed Christian counselors experienced in helping people of all ages find healing for a wide variety of issues.
© 2023 Bellevue Christian Counseling. All rights reserved.
330 112th Ave NE,, Bellevue, WA 98004. Tel (425) 939-6856.
Facebook Twitter Online Counseling About Us Privacy Policy Terms of Use Feel free to contact us!
COVID-19 Service Update: We are still open for business. In office and online counseling is available if needed.