Finding Joy in Solitude: Fighting Loneliness and Anxiety When You’re Alone for the Holidays
Tammette Chitwood
The holidays are often portrayed as a time for family gatherings, festive meals, and a sense of togetherness. But for some of us, this season can highlight feelings of anxiety brought on by loneliness, especially if circumstances leave us without loved ones nearby.
If you are spending the holidays alone or you’re battling with loneliness and anxiety, remember this: you are never truly alone. God is always with you, and He can use this time to fill your heart with peace, purpose, and even joy.
In the Bible, we see Jesus often stepping away from the crowds to be alone with the Father. “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16). His time in solitude was never wasted – it was a time of renewal and connection.
Tips for Addressing Loneliness and Anxiety During the Holidays
In the same way, this holiday season can be a time for you to draw closer to God and reconnect with yourself. Let’s explore how to make the most of this season, even if it looks a little different than the “perfect” Christmas we often see in movies.
Do a heart check
Before diving into activities, it’s important to acknowledge how you’re feeling. The Bible reminds us to “cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7). Take some time to process your emotions. Cry if you need to, pray, or journal about what you’re going through. This is your time to pour your heart out to God, who listens and cares deeply about your struggles. Once you’ve let those feelings out, you’re ready to start creating new memories.
Anchor yourself with prayer
Prayer can be your strongest tool against anxiety and loneliness. Prayer is a way to connect with God, who understands your heart and loves you deeply. Tell God how you feel whether you’re experiencing loneliness or uncertainty about the future. You don’t need perfect words – speak from your heart.
Create a routine of comfort
God designed us to experience joy in small moments. Ecclesiastes 3:12 says, “I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live.” One way to cultivate that happiness is by doing things that bring you comfort. Take a long bath, listen to your favorite worship music, or rewatch some of your favorite movies. Create a space where you can relax and let go of stress. Remember, even small acts of self-care can feel like a big hug from God.Dive into your hobbies
God has given each of us gifts and passions, so now is the time to lean into yours! Maybe it’s reading, cooking, painting, or even video games. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord.” (Colossians 3:23).
When you engage in something you love, you’re honoring the talents and interests God has placed in you. If you’ve been putting off a hobby, now’s the time to dive in. Who knows, you might even discover a new skill or deepen your passion in ways you didn’t expect.
Serve others to find joy
There’s a beautiful saying, “The way to make yourself happy is to make someone else happy.” The Bible encourages us to do good to others, “It is more blessed to give than to receive “(Acts 20:35). One of the most powerful ways to lift your spirits is by serving others.
Volunteer at a local soup kitchen, visit a nursing home, or offer to help a neighbor. When you extend kindness, you not only bless others but also fill your own heart with joy. There is something deeply healing about shifting your focus from your own loneliness to someone else’s needs.
Create a new tradition
When spending the holidays alone, it’s a perfect opportunity to create new traditions that bring you joy. Traditions don’t have to be elaborate or tied to the past; they can be simple and tailored to your current circumstances. Try setting aside time for a morning walk, a cozy reading session, or a creative project.
You might also explore a new town or buy yourself a gift. By establishing new traditions, you’re not only making the holiday season special, but you are establishing a foundation for future solo fun.
Plan a special meal just for you!
Don’t let your limited budget or lack of cooking skills stop you from treating yourself. Even a simple meal can be made special. Order your favorite take-out or cook a delicious meal, use your finest dishes, read a book, or watch a favorite movie while you eat. You deserve to nourish your body and soul, so make something that brings you comfort, and enjoy it with gratitude. You never know – this could be the start of discovering a new passion for cooking.
Create a vision for the future
Use this time of solitude to reflect on where you are and where you want to be. Grab a notebook and plan for the upcoming year. “Where there is no vision, the people perish” (Proverbs 29:18). What are your dreams? What areas of your life do you want to see God work in? Setting goals is a powerful way to move forward and find purpose. A year from now, you’ll look back and see how God has brought you through this season and into something new.
Embrace community, even if in unconventional ways
If you feel like the loneliness is overwhelming, it’s okay to reach out to others. You might not have family around, but you can still surround yourself with love. Visit a church for a Christmas service, where the warmth of fellowship can make you feel at home. Simply getting out and being around others – whether at a café or a community event – can lift your spirits. Sometimes just being around people can bring comfort.
Lean into gratitude
When loneliness and anxiety threaten to take over, one of the most powerful tools we have is gratitude. Philippians 4:6-7 tells us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with THANKSGIVING, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Shifting your focus from what you lack to what you have can transform your perspective. Take some time to reflect on the blessings in your life, no matter how small.Celebrate the freedom
You have the freedom to spend the holidays however you want. No obligations, no stress, just you and God. For some, this kind of freedom is a gift. You can use this time to reflect, grow, and rest. This might become the most peaceful and meaningful Christmas you’ve ever experienced.
Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone
The holidays can be tough when you’re on your own, but they can also be a time of growth, reflection, and even unexpected joy. Remember that God is always with you, walking beside you through every moment of solitude. Use this time to reconnect with Him, yourself, and the people around you – even if it’s from a distance. Each season of life has its purpose, and this one, though different, might offer a unique opportunity for deep, personal growth.
No matter how you spend your holidays, know that you are never truly alone. God is with you and there are people, whether friends, family, church family, or professionals – who want to walk alongside you.
If you’re struggling with feelings of loneliness and anxiety or sadness that seems overwhelming, it’s important to reach out for support. Talking to a therapist can be a powerful way to process your emotions and gain practical tools to use in tough times.
Proverbs 11:14 reminds us that “Where there is no guidance, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.” A therapist can provide that guidance, helping you uncover new perspectives and offering a safe place to share what’s on your heart. To meet with a therapist about loneliness and anxiety during this holiday season, contact our office today.
“Wreath”, Courtesy of coincidence, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Candles on a Christmas Tree”, Courtesy of Elliott B, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Wrapping Gifts”, Courtesy of Roberto Nickson, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Sparkler at Christmas”, Courtesy of Getty Images, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License